i kill time this way too...

If i go with assumption that i will lead a really healthy life,my imagination takes me only my 80th b'day.
i cant think further than that. the sole reality of being old and weak frightens me.
how will i be able to handle that.

i just counted, in my vista calculator ofcourse, 80 minus 26 leaves 54 years,multiplied by 365,would give 19710.
20K days of my life !!

20K !!

what a big number.what if i live each and every day !! like thay say, live life with all energy and charm
and enthusiasm. its hard for me to spend a day with all these things.

and counting backwards, 26 multiply by 365 gives me 9490 !! i have not even complete 10K days of my life !!
and still there are thousands of individuals younger than me who have lived their life more than me.

friends usually see me talking about past much of the time.things that i used to hate,things that i dislike.
all such kinda stuff.if i dont stop from this very line,i will start talking again about those things.

better i stop reminding myself those 9.5K days,but many days out of this bunch were beautiful.really beautiful.

The vision statements of government colleges

As a student i read those vision statements embossed on metal plates and nailed onto college walls. To my knowledge the objective behind objectives being displayed is to make people aware that the institution is focused on those issues and is constantly in pursuit of delivering quality.
The funny part is, they all read alike in all the institutions. So even if they have copied, u cant make out. After all, who reads those vision statements 'that' carefully.

Being a part of government run higher education system now, i uncontrollably think about why or what difference has the metal plate made to the institution i studied or the one i am working with.

It certainly can make an impression on parents visiting the college, but that doesn't matter now a days. Does it?

I am strictly criticizing only the government run institutions! The colleges, the schools ( worst affected) and all sorts of educational institution.


The one thing even you will agree with is that 'no one is interested in those visions, neither the parents nor the students and the institutions are far from believing it'.

I am no genius, but i conjecture this:

First thing: visions are long term goals. visions are not results of mathematical calculations only. visions are realization upon which the dedicated individuals constituting the institution work upon. the fruit of a realized vision then comes lately in assortments.

Second : why would an average parent care about the vision ( that has to be realized yet) of any institution? that also a government run college? (Wealthy children go to wealthy institutions with realized visions. Money still is the key to better education dude.)Today in between the jungle of colleges, for a parent the institution is just an authority that is authorized to certify their child and entitle him a Bachelor of 'anything'. Still the notion that a 'degree' will land their child in a good job exists deeply within certain section of society. Who cares about the vision!


Third: the impression of vision statements on students. it certainly impressed me when i first read a few plates at my college as student. but after reading, it was difficult to comprehend, it became difficult to correlate the action with the visions. and still it is the case with many like me. but the ones who have never read the vision statement fully in their entire academic career constitute the major part, which does involve the ones with academic excellence too. The excellence thus is not supported by enthusiasm nurtured by visions of institution but by obtuse competition that only depends on limited parameters to evaluate excellence.

the little green footprints

So fresh.So pure.our first harvest.we have already taken six such harvests in last two weeks. a handful of it suffices a small family. i was not able to stop smiling while plucking these things and moving around searching for more.
the pictures above were impossible for me to imagine when i first visited my quarter. our staff quarters are in college campus itself. it was long time since anyone had stayed in the one allotted to me. whole construction was populated by living organisms constituting lowest level of food chain to second highest one.
when i checked in, i filled up the highest level too.cleaning the quarter didn't mean only sweeping and mopping,i meant dealing with variety of hornets, mantises, termites, lizards, beetles, crickets, spiders, bats and hundreds of nocturnal light seeking semi-flying semi-crawling anthropods.the sight of most popular reptile in Indian sub-continent was not less frequent.

glimpse of a snake or two has been a routine. mongoose are also a part of our surroundings as much as they comprehended us to be a part of their locality now.
this is the first time i can say i have literally earned (harvested) the fruits of my toil. it was very timely decision by Mukundbhai, my kind neighbour who is a lecturer in mechanical department to utilize our backyard. the beginning was not that easy although. we had to remove weeds first of all,all the wild plants that had grown around like trying to invade the building. the thorny ones were the though to remove. the deep rooted ones came next. and all was done with a spade, a sickle and lots of sweat.
Mukundbhai not being a novice had better experience in doing necessary and sufficient things, tilling the soil a bit, nick here nick there for irrigation, tying the strings for vines of 'turya' and 'dudhi', all was done with much less resource and little external help.had we waited for the pwd (public works department) fellas to help us out in cleaning the backyard, the backyard would still be in primitive state. we applied the basic rules here, we want to do it, we will do it. that's it.
see the flower and the fruit. so pure. its zero fertilizer, zero pesticide product. the home grown, organic food. just imagine how many carbon credits we earned !! we saved the fuel that would take us to market, few polythene bags that vendor uses and most importantly our intestines !! ( from fertilizers and chemicals thrown over vegetables.)
i am not at all suggesting or preaching that everybody should work on such backyard projects or get concerned about earning carbon credits or lessening the carbon footprints. most of the Indian population is not even aware of these things. in fact, a very large part of population is not even making a countable carbon footprint yet,lets spare them from the lessening part for now. but, this is a kind of investment that reaps more intangible results than the tangible ones.


the flowering of these plants were a result reached after regular work on soil and irrigation, that we did to refresh ourselves from regular job. we, in a way were irrigating our hobby. our body burnt more calories so we stayed fit. the backyard was cleaned and soil levelled by us,so the place looked all dressed up. instead of weeds and wild plants sucking up moisture from soil we had productive vegetation grown on it. i don't think all this is measurable to equate it with monetary returns.

Laxman's story

Laxman was our (computer engineering) department's watchman in college. I never knew his full name but knew for sure that he was from Bihar. He was just another youngster from deep hamlets of poor state of India who had given up on getting a decent employment opportunity in his state and migrated far off west just to earn 1200/- rupees per month. The amount might barely touch half of the electricity bill of a middle class household and might just be a cell phone bill of some teenage college goer. Still, Laxman was here, right here, on his job that gave him only something he could survive with. Laxman's job was to secure the department, for that purpose he didnt actually even have a stick with him that would make him look like a security guard, but his uniform did that for him. His presence mattered though, he was a watchman, in fact the most responsible thing that he did was open the department in mornings and lock them back in evenings.
Ours being a government college, the students usually skip the last lecture, and so the teachers even get used to this timing. This actually suits a few staff members who never have to bother about last lectures in their time-table. When I was allotted a time-table with few lectures in last slot of the day, my friend already prognosticated that the lecture would seldom be a reality. And he was true. The class with the strength of 60 can in no way be called a class with only 15 students present to attend the lecture! i still insisted on giving the lecture.
On one evening Laxman enterd my cabin, which he usually had to do to ask me to packup so that he can lock and seal the department. i was busy downloading notes for lectures so had to ask him to sit. I enjoyed talking to him, mostly because of his bihari ascent. ( Aur sab band kar diye hain, bas ek aap hi ka baki hai sir). I straightened myself on my revolving chair and rolled back to position myself straight to Laxman. I asked him about his village, his family and his education. He did pass the 10th as far as i remember. After a while, Laxman did seem a bit opened up, i then had to ask about him being a watchman. There was something i was going to know that i never knew.
Laxman started with 'hum to fauj me jana chahte they' ( i wanted to join the army). Laxman said that he went to the center where thousands of youngsters (mostly from the poor villages) of Bihar had gathered to pass the physical test for recruitment in indian army as sipahi. He even passed the running test that measures physical fitness of a candidate. 'phir wo humse 5000 rupya mange' ( then they asked for 5000 rupees from me). i almost shouted 'kaun maange rahe itna rupiya?' (who asked for this much money?) and my face had wrinkles as if i was pricked; stung almost. Laxman replied 'wo agent'. I started firing him questions of all kind; what kind of agents? ; what about rules?; who would pay money to risk lives?; and that there is nothing like paying money to get into job which deals with putting your life direcly in service of nation's security !! Laxman's knowledge even limited his vocabulary, he didnt knew much words even to describe a problem clearly, but he said that it was men in uniform themselves who acted as agents or the agents were working and flourishing with total partnership with their friends in uniform.
I am sure my brain had to reset and restart some neurons that went blank after such a shocking revelations from Laxman. I felt so helpless that i could do nothing about people not standing up to respect national anthem or people who dont care even once a year to pay tribute to soldiers who lay down their lives or what a soldier at border post goes through or what a soldiers family goes through during a war!
In india, soldiers at border, the first most vulnerable wall that guards us, die everyday in one or the other way! It is these poor Laxmans who even after knowing the reality are left with no option but join the army as 'sipahi'. Where he is asked again for money!! How can i call it a bribe? it is an agents pay u see!
'to tune kya kiya?', i asked immediately ( few milliseconds had passed as my brain restarted). 'hum rupya lene gaye vapis gaav' ( i went back home to arrange for money). 'to tum rupya de kar bhi bharti hona chahte they?'(so you wanted to join anyhow,even by paying money?) i asked with my anger now on Laxmans ignorance and fallacy. 'haan' he said.
'phir gaye kyo nahin?' (then why didnt you go?) i wanted to know now how he landed on a job that pays him 1200 a month. 'aarrre sahab', his spoke in his slow miserable, 'hum bus se aa rahe they. bus ki chhat par baithke vapas aa rahe they, rupiya lekarke, par hum upar se gir gaye, chalti bus se, humari tang tut gayi aur hum chhah mahina tak khatiya pe rahe'. (i was returning with money through bus and i was sitting on top of it, i fell from over the top of the running bus and broke my leg,got 6 months of bed rest)
When i asked him the reason to sit on top of bus, he said there are less state government run buses in villages there, the goons and big-shots get their own transport running and damage the government run buses. So the buses are always run over crowded, only then will they earn, and it is normal to sit on top. It was thus normal for people even to get news of someone falling off the running bus too I guessed.
Laxman was not able to walk normally for next 18 months after that fall.
So here was Laxman, watchman in a college far from his village and friends and relatives.
The download was complete and i clicked the shutdown icon on screen. AS the PC was busy killing the processes, Laxman had started his process to lock the department and I said to myself 'at least I am at better place' immediately followed by 'am I?'
Laxman no longer works here.

Suffocating The Pavagadh

i have always loved climbing hills. the Pavagadh hills are one of the many beautiful places in Gujarat. i enjoy climbing so much that i have visited it almost every year since last three years. it is with my friends mittal and kalpesh that we plan one day in the middle of the year. our plans are in fact the most short living and abrupt, the quality of making such fragile plans has come to us during our college days when every day was almost unplanned for us .a very distinguished thing about hills in India is that; none is left virgin.

Every hill top in india has a very common structure, a place of worship, that is visited by more that tens of thousands of people. i bet on one thing that Pavagadh was definitely more beautiful before 25 years form now. i havent see any picture of it. but the picture i see today is far from being beautiful.

every religious place in india literally stinks with all those pooja materials thrown into waters (that earlier were flowing but are now stagnant), or with the ghee spilled over places or with coconut water inviting flies and sweet prasad fallen on ground while feeding monkeys or rats or elephants.

here at pavagadh, i saw garbage dumped behind the market, full of plastics. polythene bags or water bottles. just anything you name. people come here with the expectation that god will solve their problems and in that process they unknowingly pollute mother earth that would furthur increase problems.

being from a tribal community, i always had this attachment towards woods and plants and nature. i know its not possible to completely stop anything wrong. but atleast dont throw plastics in national parks, jungles and hills with gods and godesses on top of them.

i guess if you are reading this, then you are educated enough not to do such things, but to prevent those who cannot read this blog is what remains to be done.

when i saw the plastic dumped atop the hills, a cartoon movie started runnnig though my mind wherein the whole pavagadh was getting covered with a giant plastic bag, slowly covering over it like a cloud, and finally the hill stops breathing inside that bag.

as if the pavagadh died of suffocation.

Engineering and the engineers of future

I have studied in a government engineering college and I am a lecturer in one now. So, I can at least say that I have seen a government organization good enough to have developed an opinion about it, both as a student and an employee of it.
Nothing much is left to say about technical education in Gujarat after an official report at national level has concluded that Gujarat’s teacher: student ratio in technical education is only better than UP in India. x
It doesn’t just stop at the ratio being sick, but even the very little amount of teaching staff that is left for engineering students here is also not “up to the mark”. Let’s leave out the “enthusiasm” part out of teaching presently, but even without enthusiasm for teaching, the teachers first have to develop enthusiasm for developing and sharpening oneself.
The picture is not very bad. There are examples of faculties who pursue higher studies and go on even to earn PhD from reputed institutions. There are always good stories to tell and inspiring examples around in every government organization.
The problem lies in the rest of the mass who is blind to such inspirational individuals. There are people who are worst at even managing people under them, but who still hold key position (mostly they demand it) so as to bully around. There are lecturers in government institution who are governments son in laws, (I hope u understand what I mean here, they are permanent employees) who don’t give a damn about what or how much knowledge have they imparted to future generation, or how much they themselves are ready to change with changing scenario of industry.
The labs for engineers are up to date with the equipments, the computer with the software. That is only because; all these things can be bought by paying for it, with warranty. But the odd thing is; how can you buy people with such “warranty”?
How can the government buy a lecturer who has the ability to transform a 12th pass student to an engineer?
My qualifications are not acceptable enough to make any reader believe that what I am talking here can be a solution to the problems. Some may find even difficult to see the problem itself. So if no one sees the problem, how can they accept a solution for one?
A student enrolled in Government College today expects a free life. I mean it, both literally and figuratively, they are freedom to attend/bunk class and freedom to attend/bunk labs. That’s it. I tired to figure out other kinds of freedom but nothing came to my mind. The fact is, students exercise one more freedom that has very bad impact on their future, even worst than bunking classes, and it’s the unguided and misinformed freedom of thoughts. Being a student, I never found all the lectures useful, most lectures were so useless that the Directorate of Technical Education here should give the subjects for self-study to students. (it is the subject named computer networks, the book is so well written, a lecture kills the joy of studying that subject).
So it is the thoughts; the minds of students have to be captured and guided. They need to find a way pretty early. Students today don’t want a theory to be taught in class, the same theory topic would pop up hundred pages on Google search. They are hungry for something that they are not always aware. So first they should be made curious and hungry so much that they should eat up and digest every though fed to them.
This requires skill; skill to make the students scuba dive into ocean of knowledge; to make him learn the art of inhaling the answers and exhaling the questions; It is never taught to anyone, it has to be developed. It needs the teacher to be constantly learning, improving and they very much – enthusiastic. The future engineers hence would be the result of enthusiasm of engineers of future – we the teachers.